Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The Muslim and the The Haircut

The following is adapted from an Internet email making the rounds. I have heard this joke over the years in a number of different languages with punchlines mocking diverse ethnic groups and various professionals such as lawyers and politicians. In almost all cases, although the butt of the joke is stereotyped, the argument put forth presents a truth about those being ridiculed.

Here for your enjoyment is a very short story that reveals a truth about the nature of Muslims living in civilized countries. And to be fair, not all Muslims, just most of them.




The Muslim and the The Haircut



One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut.

After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, "I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week." The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, "I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week." The cop was happy and left the shop.

The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.

Then a Muslim came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, "I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week." The Muslim was very happy and left the shop.

The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Muslims lined up waiting for a free haircut.


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Sunday, March 06, 2011

Muslims Fleeing riots Need a Big Place to Stay

So here is the deal: suppose you are a typical Bahraini prince with 4 wives and 57 children. You have enough money to escape to any country in the world - but in what city can you find enough room for your whole family?

Sure you can rent a dozen suites at the Waldorf Astoria for a few hundred thousand dollars a week, but if your country collapses into chaos your oil allowances may get cut off. It's even possible you will eventually run out of money.

Now here is a decent place far from prying eyes and will only cost you a month's allowance - six million dollars or best offer: The Victorian on the Green. Here are some photos, please click on any image for larger view.

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Nearby, for your spiritual needs is the Islamic Society of North America in Plainfield, Indiana, the largest Muslim organization in North America.

For more details or to make an offer to buy contact me at bernieplanck@gmail.com.

It should be mentioned that this mansion has 12 suites, so it is also handy for upper middle class Egyptians with a large extended family.

Why hang around until the revolutionaries get in power and do to you what the French did to Louis XVI of France and Marie Antoinette? Available immediately for occupation.






Disclosure: I am not receiving a commission on the sale or rental of the above property.

Mosaic made with Mosaic Maker

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Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Mohammed's opinion of love

romancing the gaotThe Following can be found at Planck's Constant so it must be true:

This is Mohammed's opinion of love: "By the Prophets and all that is holy, there is nothing more pleasing to Allah than to see a Muslim lying in blissful embrace with a goat. Not just any goat, but one smelling of myrrh and dainty orchids. Such a coupling is of the greatest of all rewards, surpassing all other joys." Abu Planck Hadiths 24:7

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Monday, September 27, 2010

Pre-Existing Arab Stereotypes

In my article Reel Bad Arabs: How Hollywood Vilifies A People, I wrote that Hollywood did not invent the stereotypical evil Arab, that for over a thousand years Arab and Muslim behavior led to the common held European view that Arabs were bloodthirsty cut-throats who held slaves and massacred peoples.

I am writing this post here, away from my blog, in anticipation that some Muslim apologist, who did not read the book by Jack Shaheen, will accuse me of making excuses for Hollywood and its Jews.

The average Ahmed is taught in his school that what is holding back Arabs and Muslims are the Jews who control Hollywood and the American media. For this reason he will insist that it was not Europeans who created the world's negative view of Arabs and Muslims.

These gullible Muslims believe that all the bad things reported about Arabs and Muslims are Zionist lies and propaganda generated for the exclusive purpose of keeping the Arab in poverty and ignorance. The average Muslim does not know nor is he taught that the negative view of Arabs is a consequence of 1400 years of brutal wars of conquest, subjugation, and wholesale slaughter of unbelievers.

As hard as it is for modern civilized people to believe, there are Muslims today who will swear that Islam had nothing to do with the slave trade, that there is no slavery in Islam today. That one-quarter of the world is Muslim because they freely chose Islam as their religion, that Arab armies never subjugated a single country.

The truth of the matter is that Shaheen himself admits that the negative Arab stereotype was not invented by Americans but rather inherited from Europe.

Islamic Research Priorities on Epistemology and Thought Website, Reel Bad Arabs: How Hollywood Vilifies a People [PDF]

The first section, “The Genesis,” discusses the negative stereotyping of Arabs in American pop culture. After this, he introduces “Real Arabs” as he has known them: his family, friends and colleagues, and people he has
met and experienced throughout his life. Another part, “The Stereotype’s
Entry,” deals with how stereotypical Arab images entered American popular
culture. Here he argues that American image-makers did not invent the negative Arab stereotype, but rather “inherited and embellished Europe’s pre-existing Arab caricatures.” He elaborates, without giving specific examples, that these inherited tales were inhabited with “cheating vendors and exotic concubines held hostage in slave markets.”


It is not Hollywood or Jews who are perpetuating the myth of the stereotypical evil and barbaric Muslim, it is Muslims themselves. It is not the Jewish press that made this headline "EU decries 'barbaric' plans to stone Iranian woman."

The international crossfire over Iran's stoning sentence for a woman convicted of adultery intensified Tuesday with a top European Union official calling it "barbaric" and an Iranian spokesman saying it's about punishing a criminal and not a human rights issue.


So. Ahmed, don't look at the Jew as the cause of your miserable life, look at yourself.

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Wednesday, June 03, 2009

The Handy Arab Phrase Book

Some of my readers who might be traveling to the Middle East this Summer will find that almost all the official phrase-books do not cover the most important aspects of travel in Arab countries. So in case you ever run into a group of friendly Janjaweed villagers (pictured here), I have compiled this list of useful Arab phrases from the Internet (with a few of my own thrown in) to help you make new friends.



ما هي مصادفة ، كنت فقط أقول لزوجتي هذا الصباح عند الإفطار ، "الموت لليهود"!
What a coincidence, I was just saying that to my wife this morning at breakfast, "Death to all the Jews!"

سأقوم بكل سرور أن أبلغكم مع أسماء وعناوين العديد من الجواسيس الاميركية كما يسافر
You are quite kind in showing me your marvelous gun.


سأقوم بكل سرور أن أبلغكم مع أسماء وعناوين العديد من الجواسيس الاميركية كما يسافر
I will gladly tell you the names and addresses of many American spies traveling as reporters.


More at Planck's Constant.

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Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Sponsored Buzz : Direct Sat TV

If your tired of increasing cable bills you should check out the deals at Direct Sat TV They can have a quote for you in 15 seconds. They have 12 categories of service with over 265 channel choices.

With the upcoming change to digital TV and the increasing problems with that, Direct Sat TV may be your entertainment answer! Check them out today.

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Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Leftists Cannot Abide Criticism


Kate at the blog Small Dead Animals informs us that '[u]nder a recently-introduced bill, H.R. 1966, bloggers would face up to two years in prison if they “harass” public figures by criticizing them in a “severe, repeated, and hostile” manner, and thereby cause them “substantial emotional distress.”'.

But what public figures, I almost hesitate to call them morons, imbeciles, and tyrannical idiots, would introduce such legislation? Would you believe Liberals? The very same morons, imbeciles, and tyrannical idiots who railed against George Bush for destroying our freedoms through the Patriot Act. The bill's sponsor is idiot Linda Sanchez (D-CA) (almost all of her 14 co-sponsors are liberal idiots as well). I hope and pray that my calling her a complete moron causes her substantial emotional distress. In fact, I wish she would have a complete mental breakdown over this blog article. It's the least punishment she should get for even suggesting such a hobble on the freedom of speech. What country is she representing, Cuba, Venezuela?


Read the rest at Congresswoman Linda Sanchez is an Idiot

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